“Some people showed who they were at first glance, but you looked away and heard what you wanted to see.” – Todd Covington
We all battle some form of self-delusion, with manifestations as unique as our very selves. It could be unrealistic expectations, unrealized potential, or unrecognized weakness. But we also are confronted with external deception. Daily, those internal struggles spill out into our interactions with others (and theirs into ours). We extend images that we assume will be palatable to the masses. We seek refuge in a mirage, attractive yet devoid of substance. Given time, the facade fades and those around us face what we’ve been avoiding in the mirror all along. We find the foundations fraudulent, as our lovely bow begins to unravel.
We are the victims of both what we invent and what is projected to us. We close our eyes and envision what we hope to be in front of us or are just as aptly fooled by a clever guise. In either case, reality is obscured in a cloud of dishonesty and confusion reigns.
What To Do ( aka what I’m learning to do)
1. Invite and engage transparency
Shadows conceal detail while light exposes for greater scrutiny. The cost of honesty is discomfort. Walls don’t fortify us as individuals, they trap us. Others may not have access to hurt you, but you’ve relegated yourself to the few resources you retain. Eventually, rations will run out. We need each other.
2. Exercise wisdom
James 1:5. You have to possess it before you can implement it. If we all had the capacity to figure EVERYTHING out, you wouldn’t be reading this. Nor would I be writing this. I’d discount my insight as simply run of the mill and neglect to share. And those who mentored me would have assumed likewise. What a recipe for disaster! After all, assumptions are unproven inferences. Our relationships are concrete. We need to approach them with something real.
[The number designations are arbitrary; one bolsters the other, bringing balance.]
Don’t idle in the illusory.