Original Poetry: Past, Progress

I stood alone

still

taking a gander at my present

deliberating

what roads I had I traveled and

which routes I had taken when

in times preceding, this “now” was on the horizon

the how and who of inner monologue

so to

learn from the rear view

I

donned my retrospective lenses

hindsight is 20/20 when your vision’s been corrected

I saw

me

embodying a lower case i

because shyness had me speaking into my chest to avoid both eye contact and the silent judgments we all make

the mirror and I at odds because of my uneven skin tone

scared to smile because I knew that lying was wrong and people might be misled into thinking I was happy

inhabiting the background

at “home”

in solitude but desperate for the solidarity of a confidant

no confidence to will my ambitions

filled with potential but no energy expended to succeed

in need with no voice to express it

but when things made an impression I would grab my pen

and the ink would flow

though tears would smudge

my paper, a sponge

soaked in emotions untold

eventually

I would become

bold.

To be continued…

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